My first job when I was younger was as a veterinary assistant. The job consisted of walking dogs, cleaning kennels, and holding animals on an exam table while the doctor poked and prodded at them to treat their ailments. The days were long, but many valuable lessons were learned. One skill I learned that I didn’t think was applicable later in my life was the art of handling cats. I find it very similar to handling founders. Let me explain.
Cats are skittish animals that do not like to be bothered. They have two primary weapons- their teeth and their claws. As a veterinary assistant, my job was to allow the doctor to do what they wanted without being bitten or scratched. I was taught a particular way of handling cats which can be visualized below.
As you can see from the picture, it seems traumatic for the cat, and believe me; they didn’t like it. I was a one-trick pony, as this was the only way I knew how to handle a cat. One day as I was starting to get a cat in the position for the doctor to begin his work, he stopped me and asked.
“Why are you handling the cat like that?”
I replied – “it was how I was taught.”
He then explained that yes, that is one way, but it is only necessary about 5% of the time- in most circumstances, you can handle it in a much less evasive way without stressing the cat out and making it struggle. He then showed me how just to hold my arms over the cat- to ensure it doesn’t jump off the table while scratching its head for it to feel comfortable. See below.
How is this relevant today? First, it is very applicable to communicating with founders. As a minority investor, I have made the mistake of putting great stress on funders due to my control issues. This “handling” I compare to the first technique described above. My chokehold would manifest in constant emails, passive-aggressive comments in board meetings, and very few boundaries. As a minority investor, you can see how this communication style is problematic.
From doing it the wrong way for many years, I have finally realized that I can ease up and get what I need to accomplish by establishing trust. I loosely keep my arms around the founder, so they do not jump off the table and hurt themselves while allowing them the freedom to control their destiny.
Since I have been doing it the latter way for the last couple of years, I have been getting bit and scratched much less.
